do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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