Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize