How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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