You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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