I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
