in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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