Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
