If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
