Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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