I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
