so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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