Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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