You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
