I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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