the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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