He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
