Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
there was a trapeze. enough said
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
