To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
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