Kareoke will never be a sober sport
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
