I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
