I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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