Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
