This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
