How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
