Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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