Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
