Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
