i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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