problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
