Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
