my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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