There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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