I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
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