You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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