I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize