even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
