The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
