I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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