No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Small penises have feelings too.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize
