I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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