so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
We left an ass print on the piano.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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