The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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