lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize