so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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