someone owes me an orgasm
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
