Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
