these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
