I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
