you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
