dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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