totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
