Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
