Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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