ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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